Ok so I personally am sick of the Republicans of this country. Need I explain why? Now if they wanna go fuck up their own lives that is their issue. I am a firm believer that is their right. However, the last 8 years they’ve been fucking up mine and I don’t think they have that right.
So let’s do something about it and lets do it right. Let’s do what the civil war could not do one hundred and forty some odd years ago. Let’s split the nation in two. And let’s do it better this time. Instead of going to war against each other for 4 or 5 years and killing half our populations, let’s just agree to disagree and split up peacefully. After all one of the reasons that we needed to stay together at the time was because a) we weren’t as big as we are now, b) we were younger than we are now and didn’t have solid legs to stand on, and c) alot of our exports were coming from the south (tobacco which who the hell uses anymore?).
So let’s let every state have a vote as to who gets to go where. You are either with us or against us. I figure the the states would go as such:
On the “north” side you would have Connecticut, Vermont, Rhode Island, New York, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, Michigan, Wisconsin, Minnesota, Illinois, Massachusettes, Maryland, Washington, California, Oregon, and D.C.
The “south” side would have Alaska, Idaho, Montana, Wyoming, Colorado, South Dakota, Nebraska, Oklahoma, Kansas, Alabama, Mississippi, West Virginia, the Carolinas, and Indiana.
Now these are just the likely for sures. In fact I’m not entirely sure about Kansas but whatever. This leaves us with a number of contested states. But I will do my best to split em up evenly. Again:
“North”: While Maine and New Hampshire are not entirely liberal they do tend to lean that way and I would suspect that they would go the route of the rest of New England. I think the same could be said with Ohio, barring Republicans hacking into the voting machines. I think Nevada also will go over to the North because well they have gambling and prostitution and I doubt the South would go for that. I think Arizona is moving over to the liberal point of view of late and think by the time this split would occur that they might side with going to the North, so too would New Mexico. I’m going to also award Missouri to the North as a side one, i think between Missouri, Iowa, and Arkansas one would go north and I think it’d be Missouri.
“South”: I think North Dakota would go South because nationally they tend to go republican, Utah has traditionally voted Republican, I will also give Iowa and Arkansas to the South as mentioned above. Will give Florida to the South as I think either ohio or florida would go south and I took Ohio by the North (feels like tag football doesn’t it?), Georgia, Virginia (though they seem to be turning to democrat), Tennessee and Kentucky are actually surprisingly swing states quite often but I think they tend to lean towards the south, and finally Louisiana… I honestly think this whole Katrina thing has really torn up Louisiana and killed the Republican party in that state, but I’m just going to give it to the south.
That’d leave us with final tallies of:
- North – Maine, New Hampshire, Vermont, Conneticut, Massachusettes, New York, Rhode Island, New Jersey, Maryland, D.C. Pennsylvania, D.C., Ohio, Michigan, Wisconsin, Minnesota, Illinois, Missouri, Washington, Oregon, California, Arizona, Nevada, New Mexico, and Hawaii
- South -Florida, Georgia, South Carolina, North Carolina, Virginia, West Virgina, Tennessee, Kentucky, Alabama, Arkansas, Mississippi, Louisiana, Oklahoma, Kansas, Iowa, North Dakota, South Dakota, Nebraska, Colorado, Wyoming, Utah, Montana, Idaho, and Alaska
I think that is it… oh yeah Texas. What about Texas you say? It is my understanding that Texans have secretly wanted out of the union pretty much since they joined it, so I am taking this opportunity to let them out… heck it’s possible they could convince another state like Oklahoma to join them but I’m just going with Texas as its own country.
So doing this little outline I do notice a few interesting things about our new United States countries. One, the north would be devoid of the traditional oil states such as Texas, Alaska, and I think Wyoming, Plus without any gulf states we’d be out of the gulf oil as well. We’d also be without a significant portion of crops from the plains states, but the midwest has its crops as well so it wouldn’t be a total loss. And we could fairly easily offset the loss of fossil fuels with the inclusion of nuclear fuels coming from illinois and other midwest states. I do fully admit that having a west coast and east coast totally seperated without having a connection could be problematic with traveling and power transfers but we’ll make do. Where we would lose on energy and some of the produce, we would gain back in owning the west coast exclusively, technology would be a huge factor with us maintaining the hubs of silicon valley and seattle, we would have a monopoly on entertainment with New York and Hollywood, we would also have another pacific adventage in keeping the airports and tourism of Hawaii, as well as have some leeway left with car manufacture with maintaining Ohio and Michigan (though admitadly much of this has still moved south and to China, us owning the ports on the pacific I think would be huge.)
So it wouldn’t be without its difficulty and we’d be sacrafcing stuff, but so would you. We’d both still be fairly strong. I mean hell look at the other international powers like England and France, they have much less territory really and are more split up than either side would be! So why not? We are all sick of each other, let’s just split up since we don’t get along and do what we think we need to do seperately!